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The stuffed owl : an anthology of bad verse
Lewis, D. B. Wyndham 1891-1969.
Adult Nonfiction PR1175 .S784 2003

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ContentsPage
Prefacep. vii
Proemp. xxi
Hors-d'CEuvre--Ip. 1
Hors-d'CEuvre--IIp. 14
An Archangel's Toiletp. 25
Yoicks! Gone Away!p. 25
The Body: A Fancyp. 27
No Doubtp. 28
From "Nature's Dessert"p. 28
A Posset for Nature's Breakfastp. 28
The Return of Charles IIp. 30
The English Fleet Goes Outp. 31
The Faculty at Workp. 32
To Account Renderedp. 32
The Wonderp. 33
Short Cursep. 33
On His Mistress Drownedp. 34
Heavy Goingp. 36
The Blue Pencilp. 37
Ode upon the New Yearp. 38
The Chase of the Metaphorp. 41
From the Psalmsp. 41
From the Book of Jobp. 41
The Crystal Palacesp. 42
Possibilitiesp. 42
Rosamond's Songp. 45
King Henry's Songp. 46
Mr. Gunston is Shown round Heavenp. 48
A Polyglot in Paradisep. 48
Mr. Mead, Mr. Bates, and Mr. Gougep. 49
Mrs. Warner Arrives Abovep. 49
On the Landing of William IIIp. 49
From the New Year's Ode, 1731p. 52
From the Birthday Ode, 1732p. 53
From Another, 1743p. 54
Salute to Propertyp. 55
Ode to Miss Margaret Pulteneyp. 56
To the Right Hon. Robert Walpole, Esq.p. 56
Nature Queriesp. 58
Rustic Interiorp. 61
Advice to the Stoutp. 61
The Gastric Musep. 62
On Washingp. 62
On Feather Bedsp. 63
A Submarine Jauntp. 65
Seascapep. 65
A Runcible Thoughtp. 66
"Sting Her Up!"p. 66
From the "Ode to the King"p. 67
From "Ocean, an Ode"p. 69
To a Solemn Musickp. 72
Final Paeanp. 72
Ye Nations, Tremble! Parliament has Metp. 73
With a Yo, Ho, Hop. 74
La Pudeur Francaisep. 75
Pastoralp. 76
The Insensible Hottentotp. 77
The House Beautifulp. 78
Leeds for Pleasurep. 78
Home Industries Firstp. 80
Goats and Botanistsp. 82
The Chase of Jessyp. 82
Le Spleenp. 85
Bryan and Pereenep. 88
Crescendop. 90
The Shame of Francep. 90
Advice to Slave-Ownersp. 90
Call to the Musep. 91
Of George, and Propertyp. 92
Il Lattep. 95
Hops and Propsp. 97
The Nail in the Grassp. 98
Entry of the Villagersp. 99
Cause and Effectp. 100
A Sombre Momentp. 100
Females, Sacred and Profanep. 102
Eliza at the Battlep. 106
Fine Figure of a Nymphp. 107
"Ae Fond Kiss, and Thenp. 108
The Maiden Trufflep. 108
The Birth of KNO[subscript 2]p. 108
Mr. Baker is Wellp. 109
Miss Hoyland is Coyp. 110
Mr. Smith is Deadp. 110
A Business Man's Lairp. 111
The Baileysp. 112
A Bright Morningp. 113
Invitation to the Waltzp. 113
Verses on the Death of Sir James Hunter Blairp. 114
Elegy Written after reading the "Sorrows of Werter"p. 117
The Rush to the Lakesp. 118
Some Terrify Lionsp. 118
The Poet is Piquedp. 119
The Tiffp. 119
Off Dutyp. 122
The Well-Aimed Tearp. 122
Moodsp. 124
Notice to Touristsp. 125
The Temple of Chastityp. 127
The Vest of Myrtlep. 127
Virtue Protestsp. 129
Ratiocinativep. 130
The Affectionate Heartp. 130
George III Enters Paradisep. 131
Lovers' Exchangep. 133
Domestic Chatp. 133
"What with This and That--"p. 134
Aphrodite Adiposap. 135
The Evening Strollp. 136
The Evening Sinp. 137
Britannia Rejectap. 137
The Tearp. 139
The Prisoner Scoldsp. 140
Caesar Singsp. 141
Odd Case of Mr. Gillp. 144
(Oxford Street?)p. 144
The Aged, Aged Manp. 145
Asked and Answeredp. 145
The Old Huntsmanp. 145
The Poet Reveals Allp. 147
Baffledp. 149
The Course Prescribedp. 149
A Mother's Questp. 150
Insensibilityp. 150
The Stuffed Owlp. 150
Decadence; or, The Umbrellap. 151
A Worm's Life Not Everythingp. 151
An Experiment that Failedp. 152
To Some Ladiesp. 153
The Female Friendp. 156
The First-Rate Wifep. 157
The Unfortunate Gentlemanp. 158
From "The Rose-Covered Grave"p. 159
Catastrophep. 160
The Poet Questions the Antp. 161
And So Homep. 161
A Contretempsp. 162
Proximitiesp. 163
The Once-Overp. 163
Get-Together Songp. 164
Efficiencyp. 165
Oh, No! We Never Mention Herp. 167
Something to Lovep. 168
I'm Saddest When I Singp. 168
The Soldier's Tearp. 169
I'd be a Butterflyp. 169
Insect Affectionp. 171
Marine Vignettep. 174
A Requestp. 174
Fore and Aftp. 175
On the Revolutionp. 176
The Earl and the Girlp. 177
A Challengep. 179
Only a Thoughtp. 179
Pronep. 180
Bridal Balladp. 181
Eulaliep. 182
Miss Adairp. 183
Miss Leep. 184
A Callp. 185
From "The Vigil of Aiden"p. 185
Snoblesse Obligep. 187
Excelsiorp. 190
Lord Stanhope's Steamerp. 193
On the Cork Packet, 1837p. 194
Great Western Daysp. 194
The Death of Huskissonp. 195
Roses All the Wayp. 195
The Railway Boom, 1845p. 196
A Lesson for the Proudp. 197
Vision of the World, regenerated by the Gospel and the Power of Steamp. 197
Trombone Solop. 200
Live and Let Livep. 201
Becalmed in the Tropicsp. 201
A Thoughtp. 202
From "The Old Arm-Chair"p. 202
Entry of the Marinesp. 202
A Thoughtp. 203
Incident in Italyp. 204
The Passing of Arthurp. 206
Paeanp. 207
Portrait of a Victorian Authorp. 209
The Marriage Marketp. 210
The Poor Relation; or, Pious Hope Frustratedp. 212
The Art of Giving (1850)p. 213
The Beelah Viaductp. 215
Haloes, Not Hatsp. 216
Mentem Mortalia Tanguntp. 216
A Timely Hintp. 217
Check to Songp. 219
Financial Notep. 220
The Count and the Ladyp. 221
Sordid Scenep. 222
A Divine Missionp. 224
Disaster at Seap. 226
A State Occasionp. 227
The Good Young Squirep. 228
A Graceful Divinep. 228
A Lisp in Numbersp. 229
From "Ashtaroth," a Dramap. 230
The Fight in the Cavep. 232
A Warningp. 232
Steam: The Seamy Sidep. 234
Byron: A Critical Surveyp. 235
A Noble Structurep. 237
Hic Finis Raptop. 238
The Poet is Scornfulp. 240
A Call (1876)p. 240
Anti-Bacchicsp. 241
Ode Sung at the Opening of the International Exhibitionp. 242
The Lord of Burleighp. 244
Ocean-Spoil Alive, O!p. 247
Riflemen Formp. 247
Iphigenia in Extremisp. 248
Postprandialp. 249
Subject Indexp. 253
Index of Authorsp. 263


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